I am in the midst of not trying very hard to get a job, despite the overwhelming pressure, and necessity. I decided I'd post, another whiny post about something different this time. I'm about a month on the hormones and currently 200$ of the way to my 900$ goal for my hair removal holy grail. The Following has nothing to do with my transsexuality despite the mass discrimination we face in the workplace, as I'm not passing or in the middle yet, I'm still living in my male identity and while my skin has softened and cleared up on my face a little bit, I still look more or less, unfortunately, like a boy.
It occurred to me during previous job searches, one must appear absolutely flawless, even if the general understanding amongst people is that nobody is perfect. You have to be great at customers, a flawless worker, completely outgoing and socially adept, with no emotional or psychological baggage, regardless of how well you keep personal things to yourself.
I may be exaggerating a little bit, but nobody is good at everything, and everyone seems to try to present themselves to be. I'm shy, but I'm polite and I can be outgoing when I need to be behind a counter. I have a hard time approaching people, but I can force myself to do it and be pleasant and welcoming on a job. I'd love to be able to say these things, but the honesty there waves two brilliant red flags, shyness and difficulty approaching people. I'm a hard worker, but I can be a bit slow performing tasks. If i let any of these things on in the outside world, I'd never get hired at any job anywhere.
All this being said, I've worked with employers and employees who are rude to customers, who ignore their duties, who goof off on the job and will play with other employees, when they needed to be doing work. Try putting that on an application or a resume. But the point is not that I'm a better worker. The problem is values, not work ethics. The competitive working world of America, SEEMS to value two kinds of people: Those with inflated egos so extreme, that the earnestly believe them to be that ideal, and flawless, and those who can lie through their teeth, without any care, fear or remorse.
I guess I've had awful work experiences so far, but I've always felt like a disposable tool in the work environment. I've never felt like there was any value in who I was as an individual, but only in the ideal I attempted to vaguely compare to. Maybe I'm just morbid, or too sensitive. It really feels like I'm not cut out for anything at all, when it comes down to it.
Pardon my bitterness, folks...
2 comments:
A lot of jobs in the world suck, and that's especially true of many of the ones you can get without a degree or training of some kind. I'm afraid that's reality. Even among those who have degrees and advanced training, there aren't that many for whom work is truly fulfilling.
Interviewing successfully, however, isn't about having a huge ego or lying. It's about two things: self-confidence, and presenting yourself in the best light possible. Of course an employer wants the best person for a job, or the best fit. So what you want to do is find a way to convey that you are that best person. You have to believe that you are. That's not lying. It's confidence in yourself. Of course, if a person really doesn't have the ability to do a particular job, it's probably a bad idea to apply for it, no matter how confident the person is.
Yes, money is awfully useful, especially for those of us with, well, extra expenses. You're probably going to want to figure out a way to get a job that you can stand, even if it's not one you particularly like. Everyone has to earn money, and everyone has to start somewhere and, hopefully, move toward a better job or a career.
I wish you well, Claudia! I know it's hard when you're young and first starting out. Sorry if this sounds like some old fart who has forgotten what a situation like yours is like. Believe me, I haven't forgotten.
Hey Girl,
First, there is no such thing as an off topic post in a blog. I talk about everything in mine, even what I've had for breakfast. The beauty of a blog is it is yours to do with as you please! Skies the limit girl!
Jobs, oy! I've had all kinds at all extremes and I've got to tell you they all suck.
I've been on the end you're dealing with now. Veronique is right, be the best you, the best fit for the job and find from deep inside you the confidence to be you, and be someone they want on their team. It's the dog and pony show part, and yeah, we all hate it. But confidence in you is the best thing you can bring to an interview. Show you are a "team" player, and willing to get in and give 110% and that you have a team spirit and they'll be happy.
Trust me, the other end of the spectrum is no easier... What seems like a lifetime ago, I was a highly successful IT guru. I worked as a consultant and I was turning jobs away. Turning money away. Seriously. Know what? Same s8it different pay scale, it still was rife with hassles, stupidity and waste. Heartache, hassles, etc... Doesn't really change.
So find something you can deal with, that isn't going to give you too much crap, and go with that.
Believe it or not, the two BEST jobs I ever had, and would (may even) go back to in a hot second where Frameshops and Libraries. I Love working in Libraries, well honestly love everything about them! Quiet, peaceful, relaxing even...
Frameshops the same thing. About two years ago I stopped into one of the Frame Shops I'd managed almost twenty years ago. One of the girls I'd fired when I was running the place still worked there. I was so lost in the nostalgia that I forgot how much I'd grown and changed since then. Poor Danny, she was very confused and a bit worried at first, since I was talking about things that I couldn't possibly know from her perspective. When we got caught up, and she finished marveling at the changes in me, she admitted the place was pretty much the same as I left it. We stood there talking for two hours, I even wound up helping a couple of customers. She wanted to know if I was gonna come back and stay, after all, the holiday's were coming and they could really use me. It's funny, and sweet. It was so the same, and yet so different. I was so the same, and about as different as anyone person can get. But I still had, or more to the point had gotten back, the confidence I had back in the old days. It showed to.
You are a wonderful, strong, amazing woman who has overcome (is overcoming) some of the hardest hurdles any one person could be expected to deal with. You're doing fine, I have confidence... In you! One day, you're going to make an excellent member of a team.
Give yourself time and rom to grow Luv, you're doin great!
Sam
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